smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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