my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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