So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Randomize
