ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
