she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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