Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
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