You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
