i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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