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  • This is why microwave ovens were invented.

    Submitted by cfreymarc on Feb 8, 12 at 9:16pm
  • Did it also say you're a complete dickhead??

    Submitted by T_boned on Feb 9, 12 at 6:48am
  • What did your fortune cookie tell you..?

    Submitted by dudewalker on Feb 9, 12 at 10:14am
  • You're too hungover to turn a dial, but you can still send perfectly literate texts, god I hate these types of texts, "Dude, I'm so fucking drunk right now, it's positively ridiculous, I'm cant even see straight, so intoxicated" STFU

    Submitted by Meaty_McSausage on Feb 8, 12 at 5:30pm
  • This seems like it is past tense bro

    Submitted by pnr on Feb 8, 12 at 6:19pm
  • Because it is a horoscope dumbass!

    Submitted by Problywasme on Feb 8, 12 at 8:43pm
  • well in a galaxy far far away..

    Submitted by goosetastic on Feb 8, 12 at 8:19pm
  • High Quality Fake IDs!\n\nBest quality & best price available on the market, PERIOD.\n\nVideo proof: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q0Gsh9sObUo

    Submitted by abidss on Feb 8, 12 at 8:49pm