come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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