do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.