For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
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