so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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