At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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