Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Randomize
