Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
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No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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