I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Randomize
