it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And my parents said I crawled through the house
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
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