bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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