Nicole vs. Life
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
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