No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I'm just crazy horny about you
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
