Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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