just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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