you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
