WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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