I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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