lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
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