Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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