Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
