so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I wanna passion pit in your ass
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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