question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
I think your dad took our porno
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Randomize
