is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
