The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
