Is it normal to miss your booty call?
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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