Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
