ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
my shit smells like andre
you mean i was at the winter classic?
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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