brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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