don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize
