How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
FUCK WHALES
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
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