what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Randomize
