My pussy is not your playground.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Randomize
