someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
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