I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
