So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Randomize
