Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
