We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
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Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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