I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
should my penis look like a turkey
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
