and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
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