i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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