i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Randomize
