I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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