I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Randomize
